Mental Health Check In Point
If the holiday has been draining you, you need to do a mental health check in. If we can keep our mental health in check, we can inevitably make it through the holidays!
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If you are looking for a sign to get out of bed, take a shower, walk outside, or a simple reminder that you are important: Here it is! This is your sign!
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Mental Health Check Ins-
December 2019.
Thanksgiving has passed!
Parties have been planned. * Invitations have been sent. * RSVPs are coming back. *
We are a little under two weeks until Christmas Eve!
Bonuses are made. * Christmas trees are up. *Presents are wrapped. * Mistletoe is hung. *
It’s Christmas Day!
Everything comes together. * Families gather * Friends laugh together * Kids celebrate *
The New Year comes!
And there we are. * Back to our normal life again. * The holidays are over. * We made it. *
(At least, until November.)
Mental health during the holidays seems easy when it’s thought about that fast, huh?
Everyone is happy. Families are thankful. Finances aren’t shot.
but, wait.
Okay, no. Let’s hit the brakes on this fantasy and look at reality:
Holidays are S T R E S S F U L.
Over the last few weeks, I have made a few posts on instagram discussing mental health, reaching out as an ear if someone needs to talk, and inquiring on other’s self-care tips.
And I will say, I was actually pretty blown away by the amount of responses I was receiving.
I know that I have not been the most active platform user over the past few months, due to many reasons. So, I have seen my engagement levels decrease: story views making a significant drop. It hasn’t really bothered me, I just didn’t think I was going to have people responding to my questions. But, boy was I wrong! Y’all came through!
So, I figured I would do an entire blog post dedicated to
Mental Illness (Stigma) + Mental Health + Self Care
*Disclaimer 1: The following information does not revolve solely around holidays, as I believe these three topics ALWAYS need to be openly discussed. I do think that holidays (primarily November, December, and the beginning of January) can cause more stress on us than other months of the year do. With that being said, it is hard to find real research on how holidays directly effect us, and due to wanting to give y’all the most accurate studies and information I can find, I am going to be presenting research on mental health, mental health recovery, mental illnesses, the stigma around mental illnesses, self-care and tactics, as well as some information supporting a significant link between a decline in mental health and the holiday season.*
*Disclaimer 2: Parts of this is going to sound very “academic papery” because I really do want y’all to have the facts- not just how I feel about it. So, I will cite information, have direct quotes, and probably have legit paragraphs so that everything flows nicely. Don’t hate the player, hate the game. If society put out more, legit information on these topics, I wouldn’t feel the need to make this post. But, since they don’t… *sips tea*… let’s begin.*
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Buckle up, boys. We ‘ bout to learn a lil’ sumn sumn.
*Can we just note that I literally finished this semester having written more papers than I have had to my, like, entire college career, and then turned around to research everything I could in a timely manner about mental health to write this blog post?*
Am I crazy? I am crazy.
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Here we go.
Mental Health Stigma
I have a few thought-provoking questions/statements to preface this section with. I just want you to self-reflect for a moment. Get in touch with how you feel about these topics, before you continue reading about them. The following paragraphs are not meant to change your opinions, but to provide you with more knowledge on the subject(s) at hand. All in the name of becomingthebestself. *insert wink here*
In your own words, describe your understanding of the term “mental illness”.
If you hear someone say that a person is “mentally ill”, what does that meant to you?
What do you think a mentally-ill person is like?
How does a mentally-ill person act?
Before discussing some studies done over this topic, I want to point out that majority research includes mental illnesses such as antisocial personality, cocaine dependence, narcissistic personality, depression, insomnia, panic disorders, bipolar disorder, narcolepsy, post traumatic stress disorder, bulimia, and obsessive compulsive disorder (Crandall and Feldman 2007). I wanted to make that clear so that we can understand what this research covers, before assuming incorrect information.
Researchers involved in the Star survey asked the previous questions (the ones I asked you to self-reflect with) to 352 individuals in 1950. In hopes of different answers involving less negative stigma, a set of researchers began a new survey in 1996, the GSS (General Social Survey), and asked the same questions again to 653 other individuals (Pescosolido, et al. 2000).
Although the results were not necessarily surprising, they were kind of disheartening. Upon analyzing their findings, the researchers reduced their coding into ten categories within two groups of variables (dependent and independent) including: symptoms, psychosis, anxiety/ mood problems, social deviance, cognitive impairment, non-psychotic problems, education, family income, and community size.
Within each of the codes, they then looked at the language used by the subjects being surveyed (Pescosolido, et al. 2000).
*Jess, what even is coding?*
Okay, so coding is basically when researchers take their findings, and group together similar answers or results.
Listed below are answers that the public gave in response to the previous questions. After the researchers gathered all of their information, as in the descriptors used below, then then organize all of the results into codes.
This just allows for easier analysis and an easier method in presenting findings. Based on the article “Public Conceptions of Mental Illness in 1950 and 1996: What is Mental Illness and Is It to be Feared,” some of the answers to this research describing characteristics of mental illness were:
-Unstable –imaginary friends –extreme emotions
-Violent –wanders off for days –cant handle money
-Irrational –out of (his) mind –cant cope with reality
-Extreme –anxious –emotional problems
-Lives in own world –depressed –cannot reason
-Crazy –angry –nervous breakdown
-Deranged –stays to themselves –difficulty fitting into society
By now, I’m sure you’re thinking this is just too much information for a blog post. You’re also probably wondering why in the heck am I using data from 2000, when that was *almost* twenty years ago (Pescosolido, et al. 2000). But there’s two things I want to point out:
- Society still uses these words and phrases to describe individuals with different mental illnesses.
- Often times, we are described by others using these exact same words.
Although I agree that the average person is not regularly described as “deranged” or “wanders off for days” or “can’t cope with reality”, how many times have you gossiped to your bestfriend about someone who has emotional problems?
Or maybe you’ve seen someone have a nervous breakdown. And, honestly, half the time, I, myself, don’t want to fit into society.
(We are all sick in our own way. Maybe just not in a diagnosable sense.)
I say this not to belittle mental illness, but to shine light on the fact that we so negatively group individuals with serious mental illness issues- biological or psychological- but yet we take their descriptors as our own.
(Pause here: I know exactly what I want to say and the point I want to get across, but I’m having a hard time putting into words that form coherent sentences. Bare with me.)
I do think that there are some, possibly many, individuals who do need very intensive medical overview and diagnosis. I also think that often times, we observe people at their very lowest, and too quickly place a mark on their back that continues the belief that all individuals with mental illnesses are violent. That they are all depressed or anxious. They all act irrationally, all the time.
***Spoiler alerts for The Joker (2019) below. Skip past the italicized if you haven’t seen
this movie and don’t want any spoilers! Now is your chance! A warning has been made!***
(Want to get an example of this? Go watch Joker, which released this year, 2019. *Spoiler alerts ahead* Even the Joker didn’t lash out until society pushed him too far.
He has Pseudobulbar affect [PBA], which is a real disorder normally caused by trauma to the head. This disorder causes uncontrollable laughter, in no way tied to actual feelings or emotions. [Side note- there has recently been a new FDA approved medication released for PBA.]
This movie is presented in Arthur’s [Joker’s real name] point of view, which shows us how minds can mix truth and reality. Anyways, the Joker, being a psychopath, [sociopaths are usually well-liked individuals: Ted Bundy, for example] made quick decisions on how he wanted to get his revenge AFTER nearly everyone in his life assured him that he was never going to be liked and never going to have an easy life- regardless of the effort he is putting in.
They show this in many ways… he works- and then gets beaten up and his sign was stolen; he tries comedy- get picked up by a big show host due to his unrecognized PBA disorder; his coworker gives him a gun for protection- then rats him out about having his own gun…
Society never even gave him a chance to get better. Society let him suffer and never stepped in. Society chooses to carry stigmas as well as make more stigmas. Think about what we could do if, instead of blocking people out, we tried to help.)
[Okay, you’re safe from the spoilers now.]
On the same hand, I believe that everyone can break, dependent upon their life. Self-inflicted or not, if you go through enough (which is a relevant term), and respond in any way society does not deem acceptable, you too will be described with these same characteristics. The difference is, you don’t have a declared mental illness, so your life just sucks. You’re just going through it.
We tell these people that they cannot fit into our society, and then sit back and wonder why they have difficulty fitting into our society.
We then, at times, act the same as them because sometimes our lives are hard too, and feel superbly unmanageable, but it’s okay for us- because we don’t have a mental illness.
Isn’t that ironic.
This is stigma.
Stigma is not giving a person the opportunity to be good, because you already grouped them into the bad.
Stigma is associating one person with an entire group, due to one characteristic.
According to Crandall and Feldman in “Mental Illness Stigma: What about Mental Illness Causes Social Rejection,” they state that mental illness can cause two types of harm: direct effects of the disorder (i.e. one’s ability to function, behavioral difficulties, cognitive functions, etc.) and “fractured identity that comes from stigma of mental illness” which includes social rejection (Crandall and Feldman 2007).
They also uses Goffman’s definition of stigma which is “an attribute which is deeply discrediting”. They state that a stigmatized person wears a mark that defines them as flawed or undesirable. Following their definition of stigmas and other associated terms, they begin listing out ways these stigmas influence these individuals: employment discrimination, low self-esteem, low life-satisfaction, social rejection… and those are just a few.
An intriguing direct quote from this article is,
“Deviance can lead to social rejection, but surely not all deviances are equal… Shortness can cause social disruption, but left-handedness rarely does; skin color can strongly affect social relationships, but hair color may have a more modest impact” (Crandall and Feldman 2007).
This quote HITTTT, due to pointing out how we are so quick to give negative connotations to one thing, but look right past its commonly seen similarities. We look at one thing society says is unfit, and ignore every other characteristic that’s ‘normal’.
This is stigma.
To tie up this section, I just want to list the model that Crandall and Feldman discuss as the means that lead to social rejection: personal responsibility, dangerousness, and rarity.
This means that people stigmatize a mental illness due to the lack of fault on a person, the amount of threat a person can (assumably) be, and how uncommon the illness can be (which can merely be a lack of chosen/unchosen ignorance). They then discuss the three ways they believe we, as a society, can reduce these stigmas: therapist behavior, self-concept target, and mass education of society.
Therapist behavior is seemingly making sure these health care providers have the appropriate training in regards to the stigmas around mental illnesses. Without understanding how these stigmas can affect the individual, it’s easy to overlook the stigmas they face and find them unimportant. Therefore, we need to be aware of the stigmas, in order to break them.
In regards to the self-concept target, Crandall and Feldman explain this as a way to break the stigmas within the individuals themselves. Meaning, people tend to believe what they are told about themselves. If we can target how these individuals have stigmatized their own illnesses, we can begin to try to fix what is internalized.
Lastly, they recommend educating society with even just general information on mental illnesses, rather than only showing media’s negative views (Feldman and Crandall 2007). (Which is the point of this part of this post- to educate.)
At the end of the day, that person may be just as bad as you thought they may be. But just what if they aren’t?
And, yeah, at the end of the day- we all judge books by their cover. But if we consciously make the effort not to, we can stop stigmatizing everything due to what society says we should see. Maybe one day, society won’t tell us how to feel, because society will be made up of individuals who feel and think on their own.
If society starts encouraging society to give everyone in society love, we’ll have a society of compassion, rather than hatred.
Positive Mental Health
I know this is a holiday check in, and I seriously do want to focus on mental health and self-care, but I felt like this was prime time to give a little info on mental illness to hopefully break the stigma. With that being said, let’s talk mental health.
Within the last couple years, especially this year (2019), I have seen a great, heavy push towards positive mental health! I will also say that within the past two years, I have actually made an effort to habitually check in with my mental health state and make sure that I’m okay– before I get pushed too far and realize I should’ve checked on myself a long time ago.
(I’m not good at this, though. I still have to remind myself, and be reminded, to take care of myself. It’s not easy, because we’re taught to grind, regardless of our mental state. Therefore, it’s up to us to begin prioritizing ourselves.)
So, before I go into different self-care tips, I want to give a little background on mental health itself.
Mental health is obviously just that: the health of your mental state. With that being said, we know that it can vary. Your mental health is all determined by your thoughts, feelings, behaviors, surroundings…
In “Complete Mental Health Recovery: Bridging Mental Illness with Positive Mental Health,” Provencher and Keyes explain that there are thirteen dimensions that reflect a positive mental health state. They categorize these dimensions into three overall categories: hedonia, positive psychological functioning, and positive social functioning.
Hedonia is the fancy word for “emotional well-being”. This category is primarily your quality of life. Therefore, for positive mental health, your life should to be peaceful, you should be interested in what you are doing day-to-day, and you should strive to have good spirits. (See the good.)
Are you satisfied with your life? Are you thriving? Are you stressed? Are you feeding yourself negative thoughts?
Positive psychological functioning (or well-being) includes self-acceptance, growth, and purpose. We have to make sure that we actually like us. We have to make an effort to challenge ourselves, so that we can continue to develop and grow. Our life has to have meaning, to ourselves.
Positive social functioning (or well-being) is the last category. This is basically what it sounds like: who are you surrounding yourself with? We need to make sure we are building positive relationships, not ones that drain us. We need to not only be socially accepting, but we need to be in places where we are socially accepted. Just like with our psychological functioning, we need to be in social groups where we are constantly challenging our peers to grow, and they are challenging us in return. Lastly, we need to be integrated with society, as well as knowing our contribution to society is useful (Provencher and Keyes, 2011).
Now, that may seem like a lot. I know you’re probably thinking, “Okay, well I’m not Miss Positive Pam over here and that’s way too much for me to start practicing,” but I’ve got some good news for you! Studies have shown that to be considered flourishing in life, we only need to have high levels (meaning we have practiced positive forms of these functions either every day or almost every day for the past two weeks) of seven out of the thirteen dimensions listed (Provencher and Keyes, 2011). (I only listed about ten, for the sake of this blog post, but you get the drift. The more good we do for ourselves and others, the healthier our mental state will be.) But if seven out of thirteen is still overwhelming, let’s start with little things.
Bring on the Self-Care
Okay, I know this has been an overload of information. I’m finished with the statistics and scholarly articles and citations and all that fun stuff.
Now we’re just going to talk about different ways we can check in on ourselves. I am going to break these down into four groups: emotional, psychological, social, and physical.
These aren’t going to be end-all be-all tips, and they also probably won’t be profound. But, sometimes, the simple things work wonders, and if we’re going through a slump, it’s kinda hard to think of ways to help pull ourselves out of that.
So, if you’re reading this and you’re not in a good place, try to do at least one practice out of each group. See if you feel a little better. And, then, if you don’t, come back and try another.
Just don’t give up on yourself.
- Emotional:
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- First of all, if you need to cry- cry.
- Therapy
- Write down all your feelings on a piece of paper. When you’re finished, either hide it away or burn it. But, let it all out in your own words. (Dear diary… poetry… blog post… story…)
- Watch some funny videos or a comedy. Laugh a little bit.
- Think of three of your favorite things to do- do one.
- Tell people how you feel. Don’t bottle things up.
- If you need to have a conversation with someone about something, go do it. (Here’s your sign.)
- Don’t force yourself out of sadness. It unfortunately doesn’t work that way. Allow yourself to feel, just make sure you’re taking care of yourself while doing so.
- Pray. To God, to the God of your understanding, to the universe, to whatever you practice. Just pray.
- Psychological:
- Write long term and short term goals. Then, write out the steps it takes to reach them. Then, start with step 1, and continue until you’re done.
- Determine your purpose in life. Make sure you are doing at least one thing per day to maintain this purpose.
- Sit outside and just breathe fresh air. Observe nature. It’s beautiful!
- Read a book. Start a book. Read a blog post. (Look here! You have basically completed this one!) Just read. Reading is good for our brains.
- Take yourself on a date.
- Social:
- Get involved with your community.
- Go to dinner with your significant other.
- Become part of a club. There are clubs and groups and meetings for EVERYTHING. Get online and find something that interests you. Book clubs, hiking clubs, study groups, travel groups, hunting clubs, fishing clubs, photography groups… dude, there’s literally something for everyone. Go be around people.
- Take a new class. Not for school, not a required course. Just take one. Just like with the last point, you can really find a class for anything you want to do! Just get online and start looking. (I started sign language a few months ago, and I have not only learned a new language, but I have gained an entire new family! We look forward to seeing each other and planning events! It gives us all a sense of belonging within a social setting!)
- Plan a group date with some friends. Grab some dinner and check out a new movie. Surround yourself with good people.
- Physical (my personal favorite way to take care of myself):
- Take a shower. If you haven’t today, or this week, or however long- go take a shower. You’ll most likely feel better if you’re clean!
- Put on clean clothes. Even if they’re another pair of pajamas, put on a clean pair.
- Go workout.
- Go for a walk or a run.
- Go biking.
- Go hiking.
- Do a face mask!! (Guys too- your skin matters.)
- Take an Epsom salt bath. (You can add essential oils too, if you want to get fancy! Maybe I’ll give an Essential Oil Salt Bath recipe soon!)
- If you are a snacker (guilty), make healthy snacks! Unhealthy food (regardless of how good it is) weighs us down. Make some semi-healthier decisions until you are starting to feel better!
- If you are a home-body, or work from home, and never feel the need to look presentable- go get presentable. Even if you aren’t going anywhere. You feel good when you look good.
- Get a massage!!
- Stretch/ do yoga! Play some nice music and let your body flow!
Guys, we just have to take care of ourselves. And even though the holidays are supposed to fill us with cheer, we often times get busy and forget that WE MATTER. You matter. I matter.
I’m sure you were hoping for some more profound answers and tips, but that’s all I got.
I hope this post did not disappoint and I hope someone can get something out of it. I know this was a long one, so thanks for making it through with me! Comment and let me know what you thought! Also, if you have any other ways to check-in on ourselves, or self-care tips, drop them below or share them through Facebook, Twitter, or Pinterest! Remember you can also email me or DM me on Instagram. Stay well, my dear!
As always, if you need a sign to take care of yourself: this is it.
Go do something you’ve been putting off. Make time for it. Get it done.
Because as we all know:
you are the most vital character in your story!
Related articles:
How to Grow from Trauma
Stop Self sabotaging your life
Peace out, girl scouts!
… and always aim to be the best self you can be.
References
Feldman, D. B., & Crandall, C. S. (2007). Dimensions of Mental Illness Stigma: What About Mental Illness Causes Social Rejection? Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology, 26(2), 137–154. doi: 10.1521/jscp.2007.26.2.137
Phelan, J. C., Link, B. G., Stueve, A., & Pescosolido, B. A. (2000). Public Conceptions of Mental Illness in 1950 and 1996: What Is Mental Illness and Is It to be Feared? Journal of Health and Social Behavior, 41(2), 188. doi: 10.2307/2676305
Provencher, H. L., & Keyes, C. L. (2011). Complete mental health recovery: bridging mental illness with positive mental health. Journal of Public Mental Health, 10(1), 57–69. doi: 10.1108/17465721111134556
Kyle Phillips
Impressive. Love the message you’re throwing out there! Keep it up, I’m enjoying your blog more and more!
Paris J.
Hashtag proud of this and you.