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18 Ideas on How to Enjoy Your Own Company

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Enjoy Your Own Company: 18 Ways to be Alone and Happy

 

“Learn to enjoy your own company. You are the one person you can count on living with for the rest of your life.” Ann Richards

 

Hey, guys! We’re doing it a little different on this post. We actually have a guest post to talk about how you can enjoy your own company. Anita Chastain runs a self-improvement and personal growth blog at SimpleLife365. Some more information on Anita is posted at the end of this article! But, for now…

 

How to Enjoy Your Own Company

 

how to enjoy your own company

 

When it comes right down to it, we are our own best friend and partner for life. But we don’t always treat ourselves that way. 

 

In our fast-paced and over-scheduled lives, we sometimes neglect to take the time to disconnect and get in touch with our thoughts. We can learn a lot about ourselves when we learn to enjoy our own company. 

 

Sometimes, too, we may believe we have to have a partner in life to be happy. But the reality is that you don’t have to be in a relationship to feel loved and enjoy life. Learning how to spend time alone – and enjoy it – is healthy. 

 

And, there’s this too:

 

Consider spending time alone as a gift to yourself. One that you can enjoy now and for the rest of your life. 

 

Next, let’s look at how to start enjoying the time you spend by yourself. 

 

how to enjoy your own company

 

How to Start Enjoying Your Own Company

 

While there are a lot of different ways to spend time alone, many of the things you can do fall into four main categories:

 

  • Being creative.

Being creative is a really great way to express yourself and to relieve stress. It doesn’t matter what you create. The key thing is to relax and have fun. The enjoyment you get is far more important than what you create. So, write, draw, knit, or whatever! Just have fun being creative.

 

  • Doing nothing.

Sometimes the best gift you can give yourself is the freedom to do nothing. When you’re not busy doing, you have time to just be. Doing nothing also helps you reconnect with your authentic self – the person you believe you really are – because other thoughts aren’t competing for your attention.

 

  • Pursuing goals.

Sometimes in the rush of day-to-day life, you stop working on your goal. If you can relate, consider this: Many people find that spending time alone frees up the time and energy they need to refocus on achieving their goals. 

 

  • Engaging in self-care.

Self-care refers to the things you do to take care of your emotional and physical health. Self-care isn’t selfish, it’s an act of self-love and important to your well-being. Taking care of yourself emotionally and physically are two of your most important personal responsibilities. Alone time is perfect for self-care. 

 

Now that you’ve got an idea of some of the ways you can start enjoying your own company, let’s dig a little deeper into things you can do when you’re on your own. 

 

18 Things You Can Do to Enjoy Your Own Company

 

There’s no reason to be bored or unhappy when you’re by yourself. Here are 18 things you can do to enjoy spending time alone:

 

  1. Create fun mini-challenges to complete.

For example, challenge yourself to finish a half-read book or create a list of books you want to read. Or take an online class. The challenges you set are less important than the time you put into completing them, so have fun in the process.

 

2. Head to the park with earbuds and a playlist.

Never underestimate the power of spending time outside. A walk in the park and an uplifting playlist will lift your mood and make you feel better. 

 

how to enjoy your own company

 

3. Listen to a podcast on a topic you can’t resist.

Here’s a list of the 62 best podcasts to listen to right now. Listening to a podcast is a really good way to occupy your thoughts and learn new things. 

 

4. Read an article with interesting, random facts just for the fun of it.

Did you know that McDonald’s once created bubble-gum flavored broccoli for kids? I didn’t know that until I did a Google search for interesting facts. Read something random just for the fun of it. 

 

5. Write a short autobiography about your life.

Spend time thinking about your past and present and write down your thoughts as you go. At the end of the process, you’ll have a record of your life for you and anyone you choose to share it with. 

 

6. Eat dinner by candlelight.

Who says candlelight dinners have to be shared? They don’t. There is no dinner by candlelight rule, so pamper yourself. Relax and savor every bite in the soft glow of candlelight. 

 

7. Create a morning routine that energizes you.

You know those days where everything seems to go well because you had a great morning? Make them happen again by adopting a morning routine. Figure out what it takes to start each day energized and prepared and create a routine based on those things. 

 

8. Create an evening routine that relaxes you.

Figure out what’s not working, then change it. If you have trouble sleeping, create a routine to help you fall asleep. If your evenings are filled with ‘busy work’ figure out what you can stop doing, do differently, or do less often, so you can enjoy a relaxing evening.

 

9. Enjoy a social media detox.

If scrolling through your social media feed is leaving you feeling drained, discouraged, or disgusted, it’s time for a break. Whether your break is four hours or four days, commit to it, and enjoy the extra hours you have to do other things. 

 

10. Clear the clutter out of your space.

There’s a reason why home improvement shows are clutter-free zones. Rooms look better without all that clutter. and what better time to declutter than when you have time to yourself. 

 

11. Learn to cook if you’re a beginner or learn to cook something new if you’re not.

how to enjoy your own company

 

 

Even if you don’t like to cook, there’s something empowering in being able to make your own meals from scratch. Learn to cook and you’ll get to eat what you want, when you want it, without relying on takeout. 

 

 

12. Strengthen your friendships by staying in touch with people you care about.

Maintaining relationships is a lot like watering plants. If you ignore plants, eventually they die. The same goes for friendships. Ignore them, and eventually, you’ll lose them. 

 

13. Set goals for your career.

What professional goals would you like to achieve? What do you need to start doing now to achieve those goals? Answer those questions and you’ve taken the first steps in moving ahead with your career.

 

14. Set goals for personal growth and development.

What would you change to live a happier and more fulfilling life? Answer this question and you’ve taken the first step in creating the life you want. 

 

15. Focus on the good around you, even if being alone wasn’t your choice.

Our feelings follow our focus. If I focus on the bad in a bad situation, I feel bad. If I focus on the good, even when the situation is bad, I feel better. Seeing the good in your life will help you enjoy your own company. 

 

16. Don’t let your inner critic bully you when you’re by yourself.

Many people are much harder on themselves than they are on other people. Don’t let self-criticism make you feel bad about yourself. Speak to yourself with the same love and kindness you would give to other people. 

 

17. Reach out to others when you’re feeling lonely.

Connecting with friends and family helps overcome feelings of loneliness. Speaking to other people, even strangers, helps you feel better. Chat with the grocery store clerk, call your best friend, text the friends you haven’t heard from in a while. Reach out and reap the reward of human connection.

 

18. Embrace your inner artist.

When we were kids, we drew pictures because it was fun. We didn’t think about whether we had any talent. We just had fun drawing. Adopt that same attitude today. Enjoy the self-expression, forget about the rest.

 

how to enjoy your own company

 

You Can Find Happiness When You Spend Time Alone

 

Make an effort to do things that help you learn to enjoy your own company. Being alone doesn’t have to make you unhappy. The key is to make time to do things that bring happiness and joy into your life. 

 

Here’s the thing: 

 

When you enjoy your own company, you can be happy with yourself and your life, regardless of your relationship status. 

 

Here’s something else to think about:

 

Many people don’t like being alone. They believe they have to surround themselves with others to enjoy life. They’re not comfortable being alone. 

 

While there’s definitely some truth to the idea that social connections make us happier, there’s another side to think about too. When you’re alone, you have an opportunity to learn more about yourself and what you want (and don’t want) in your life. You get to focus on your own growth and development and explore what matters to you. 

 

While our connections with other people are really important, it’s also important to learn to love the time you spend in your own company. Look at it as an opportunity to get to know yourself better and do things that add value and meaning to your life. 

 

How to Enjoy Your Own Company Summarized

 

Remember that “me time” is an important part of your life’s experience.

 

When you learn to enjoy your own company, you’ll experience more happiness and fulfillment in life, regardless of the people around you.

 

how to enjoy your own company

 

About Our Guest

Anita Chastain, MBA

Anita Chastain is a writer and the owner of SimpleLife365.com. She has a passion for writing, living your best life, and number crunching using Excel. When she’s not online, you’ll find her working in her garden or binge-watching the latest series on Netflix. 

 

 

As always, if you need a sign to take care of yourself: this is it.

Learn how to enjoy your own company.

Become your own best friend.

Because as we all know:

you are the most vital character in your story!

 

Related articles:

How to Boost Your Productivity

13 Tips to Fix a Distorted Self Image

How to stop self-sabotaging your life

 

 

Peace out, girl scouts!

the best self

… and always aim to be the best self you can be.

 

How to Help Someone with Self-Destructive Behavior

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How to Stop Self-Destructive Behavior in Others

 

Do you think that you might be enabling self-destructive behavior in someone close to you? It’s time to cut that out. Let’s learn how we can help our coworkers, friends, and family grow!

 

___________________________________________________________

Heres your sign

If you are looking for a sign to get out of bed, take a shower, walk outside, or a simple reminder that you are important: Here it is! This is your sign!

the best self

___________________________________________________________

how to help someone with self destructive behavior

How to Help Someone with Self-Destructive Behavior

PODCAST EPISODE AVAILABLE

 

To wrap up this series on self-sabotage, today we’re going to look at how to help someone with self destructive behavior. Often times, we are the ones enabling self-destructive behavior from our peers. When we do this, they lose their motivation to grow and divert away from self-sabotage.

 

We’re going to keep it short and sweet today. This will be our closeout article for this series! But, there are still some more self-sabotaging discussions we want to have. So, we will be touching back on this series in the future as well!

 

the best self be better

 

 (Oh, and- Make sure you become our email friend by clicking here. This way, you can stay up to date throughout this series. We’ll let you know each time a new post is up and give you even more tips than these posts provide. Also, you’ll get first dibs on our freebies and products.)

 

 

Self destruction comes from a variety of things. They may choose negative self-talk, alcohol, fear or failure or even severe drug abuse. Those are just a few, quick examples. But, my point is that we need to be paying attention to our friend’s and families lives.

 

We should always be encouraging the people closest to us to be better! Regardless of how big or small we deem their self-destructive problem to be, if we can help- we need to.

 

How to Help Someone with Self Destructive Behavior

 

Typically, no form of enabling is good. It’s nearly always associated with something negative.

 

I mean, you can enable people to reach their dreams… but that’s not usually how this term is used.

 

When you negatively enable someone, you not only allow them to continue hurting your success and happiness.

 

You also limit their ability of ever getting better.

 

In true Becoming the Best Self form, we want everyone to do just that: become their best self.  But, if we are enabling self-destructive behavior throughout those we are regularly involved with, we are helping them sabotage their lives.

 

Therefore, it’s important for us to, instead, step in and help them to stop the self destruction.

 

**We have to be careful, though.

 

Sometimes, we can begin sabotaging our own lives.

 

There’s a fine line we have to walk that floats on top of helping others, and investing too much energy into people that don’t want to change.

 

how to help someone with self destructive behavior

 

Here are 3 things not to do when trying to help someone with self destructive tendencies:

 

1. Don’t try to guilt them

 

Sometimes, our default is to do the whole, “If you loved me, you wouldn’t xyz.” But, that just doesn’t work.

 

This could actually do the exact opposite and cause the other person to become more self-destructive.

 

2. Don’t take it personal.

 

Listen, someone else being self destructive is not your fault.

 

As we’ve previously discussed, self-sabotaging behavior is due to trauma, mental illnesses, or just lack of self-confidence.

 

Regardless, it is not about you. This is about them.

 

3. Don’t become their therapist.

 

This is a job that you just, quite frankly, aren’t licensed to do and didn’t sign up for. (Unless you did… and well, you need to separate work and relationships.)

 

Friends aren’t made to be therapists. Yes, we’re made to support and listen. But, we’re not made to coach self-sabotagers through their problems and join the pity parties.

 

how to help someone with self destructive behavior

 

Here are 5 things to do when helping someone with self destructive behaviour:

 

1. Support them in getting the help they need.

 

Whether this means seeking a therapist or even medication, let them know that you are there for them.

 

Help them find resources to reach out to.

 

2. Actively avoid the self-destructive conversations.

 

You know when you’re in a conversation with someone that randomly talks about what they “don’t deserve”?

 

This is normally used as a way to justify self-isolation.

 

Here are some ways to change the conversation:

 

  • “I don’t deserve good friends.”
    • You respond, “I enjoy having you around and think you do deserve good friends, regardless of what you think.”

 

  • “I am annoying.”
    • You respond, “I find you very interesting.”

 

  • “I’m so messed up.”
    • You respond, “You are not messed up. Life has happened to you and there’s work to do, but you are normal.”

 

3. Set boundaries.

 

Since it is not your job to be their therapist, it is your job to set boundaries.

 

Remember: you are who you surround yourself with.

 

If you let their self-destructive habits linger around you, you are bound to begin participating in them as well.

 

So, instead of just dealing with it, set boundaries on what you can handle and when you are able to handle it.

 

For example, if you are not in the right mental space to deal with a cycle of self-sabotage, don’t.

 

You don’t have to entertain this behavior.

 

4. Know your place.

 

Sometimes, it’s just not your place to try to change someone.

 

Not everyone wants to be better. And, if they don’t, you can’t help them.

 

Now, if they are close friends or family to you, I recommend talking with them about any ways you could help them. (I.e. finding therapists, meditations, accountability, etc.)

 

But, if these are casual friends or acquaintances, ask yourself if it is your place to discuss this with them.

 

5. Understand that you can leave.

 

Lastly, know that you don’t have to stay in any relationship (of any sort) that you don’t want to be a part of.

 

Meaning, if their self-destructiveness is not changing and it’s taking too much of a toll on you, you are allowed to leave.

 

You are allowed to stop enabling the ones you love. For two reasons:

 

  1. Your mental health comes first. Always.
  2. By not enabling, you can push them into getting the help they need. (Even if it’s not immediate.)

 

How to help someone with self destructive behaviour (1)

 

Stop self-sabotaging behaviour in it’s tracks.

 

Not everyone is a habitual self-sabotager. But, I do think most people sabotage some part of their life at least once before they die.

 

So, take it easy on others. You never know what they’re going through.

 

Our only goal here is to do our best to motivate them to grow and develop.

 

If you found this post beneficial, or think it could be beneficial to your friends or family, make sure you share it to your social media or through texts and emails.

I always love hearing from you, so don’t be afraid to drop a comment below, email me, or reach out to me on Instagram. (Oh! Also, don’t forget to check out our new Facebook page. That’s also a great way to stay up to date with our posts.)

We are so excited to have you working on your self-growth as we start tackling our self-sabotaging behavior to strive for our best selves.

 

Frequently Asked Questions:

 

Q: How do I know if my friend is self-sabotaging their life?

There are many different forms of self-sabotage. Here are some examples of what to look for.

 

Q: What do I do if they won’t let me help?

You let them be. Like I said earlier, it’s not your job to fix people that don’t want to be fixed.

 

Q: Why do we self-sabotage?

Great question. Check out this post explaining why we self-sabotage and how to stop.

 

Q: Am I self-sabotaging?

First of all, whether you are or aren’t kudos to you for asking. It takes a lot of guts to look in the mirror. If you want to dive deeper into this self discovery, read these three self-sabotaging signs to look for.

 

 

As always, if you need a sign to take care of yourself: this is it.

 

Stop enabling this behavior.

 

Set boundaries.

 

Don’t take things personal.

 

Because as we all know:

 

you are the most vital character in your story!

 

 

Related articles:

 

Peace out, girl scouts!

the best self

… and always aim to be the best self you can be.

73 (Most Relatable) Quotes on Self Sabotage

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Quotes on Self Sabotage

If you are looking for some quotes on self destruction to help you work through, or grow from, self sabotage- well, you’re in the right place.

 

___________________________________________________________

Heres your sign

If you are looking for a sign to get out of bed, take a shower, walk outside, or a simple reminder that you are important: Here it is! This is your sign!

the best self

___________________________________________________________

 

quotes on self destruction

Quotes on Self Sabotage

(To help you learn how to be better.)

 

Before we end our series on self sabotage, I want to do something different. Today, we will be giving you x quotes on self sabotage.

 

You can bookmark this page, so that you can come back to use any of these quotes in the future!

 

the best self be better

 

(Oh, and! Make sure you become our email friend by clicking here. This way, you can stay up to date throughout this series. We’ll let you know each time a new post is up and give you even more tips than these posts provide. Also, you’ll get first dibs on our freebies and products!)

 

73 Quotes on Self Destruction

 

1. “My appetite for self-destruction and misery is greatly diminished. I’m not interested in being unhappy.” – Boy George

 

2. “There’s something very romantic about self-destruction and sabotaging your life, and taking a hammer to it.” – Gerard Way

 

3. “The status quo leads to self-destruction.” – Emmanuel Macron

quotes on self sabotage

 

4. “We are our own devils; we drive ourselves out of our Edens.” – Wolfgang Goethe

 

5. “Sometimes we want what we want even if we know it’s going to kill us.” – Donna Tartt

 

6. “I know what it is to want something that could destroy you.” – Nenia Campbell

 

7. “Drunkenness is temporary suicide.” – Bertrand Russell

 

8. “Do not kick against the pricks; you will hurt yourself.” – Aeschylus

 

9. “Be the flame, not the moth.” – Giacomo Casanova

quotes on self sabotage

 

10. “Sometimes the best offense was avoiding self-destruction.” – Brandon Mull

 

11. “Give a man enough rope and he will hang himself.” – English Proverb

 

12.  “It would be a sin to help you destroy yourself.” – Leo Tolstoy

 

13. “Don’t saw off the branch you are sitting on.” – International Proverb

 

14. “In order to understand, I destroyed myself.” – Fernando Pessoa

 

15. “Sometimes, I am my own worst enemy.” – Tim McGraw

 

16. “If you think of something, do it. Plenty of people often think, ‘I’d like to do this, or that’.” – Lydia Davis

quotes on self sabotage

 

17. “I understood myself only after I destroyed myself. And only in the process of fixing myself, did I know who I really was.” – Sade Andria Zabala

 

18. “Having a low opinion of yourself is not ‘modesty’. It’s self-destruction. Holding your uniqueness in high regard is not ‘egotism’. It’s a necessary precondition to happiness and success.” – Bobbe Sommer

 

19. “Procrastination is, hands down, our favorite form of self-sabotage.” – Alyce Cornyn-Selby

 

20. “The quickest path to self-destruction is to push away the people you love.” – Cassia Leo

 

21. “Sometimes you hit a point where you either change or self destruct.” – Sam Stevens

 

22. “Why is it that we don’t worry about a compass until we’re lost in a wilderness of our own making?” – Craig D. Lounsbrough

 

23. “Unless we learn to know ourselves, we run the danger of destroying ourselves.” – Ja A. Jahannes

 

24. “Direct lies, small lies, huge lies, and lies of omission… these are all self-serving and sources of self-destruction.” – Cathy Burnham Martin

 

25. “How am I getting in my own way?” – Gay Hendricks

quotes on self sabotage

 

26. “Resistance by definition is self-sabotage.” – Steven Pressfield

 

27. “This is how women self-sabotage and self-destruct. Unless we have constant witnesses to our hard work, we are convinced we pull off every day of our lives through smoke and mirrors.” – Sarah Breathnach

 

28. “I am really fascinated by self-sabotage. I think that there’s not a person I know who doesn’t fall victim to it. It’s essential to the human condition, and relatable.” – Kit Williamson

 

29. “I craft most of my own tragedies without ever having even the remotest understanding that it is I myself who have done the crafting.” – Craig D. Lounsbrough

 

30. “Cry wolf often enough and you eventually get eaten by the wolf, even if the wolf is you.” – Kris Kidd

 

31. “I think of myself as somebody who, in a moment-by-moment way, I’m quite happy. But, I think I am a bit doubtful and wary of true happiness, and, like a lot of my friends, there’s been a good degree of self-sabotage.” – Patrick DeWitt

 

32. “The biggest thing holding you back is almost always… you. Start there.” – Hunter Post

quotes on self sabotage

 

33. “I felt a strange delight in causing my decay.” – Robert Browning

 

34. “Our biggest enemy is our own self-doubt. We really can achieve extraordinary things in our lives. But, we sabotage our greatness because of our fear.” – Robin Sharma

 

35. “Don’t sabotage yourself. There are plenty of other people willing to do that for free.” – Jenny Lawson

 

36. “Self-sabotage is the proverbial hammer over the head that finally wakes us up, demanding that we pay attention. For most of us, it takes something devastating to crack us open, to get us out of our minds and into our hearts.” – Debbie Ford

 

37. “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Fail Quotes

quotes on self sabotage

 

38. “Much of your pain is self-chosen.” – Khalil Gibran

 

39. “When your heart knows it doesn’t belong there, it will continue to self sabotage your future, until you make the choice you wanted, but found a million excuses not to pursue.” – Shannon L. Alder

 

40. “Self-conceit may lead to self destruction.” – Aesop

 

41. “Like most other creatives, I struggle with self-sabotage, self-doubt, and feeling like an imposter more often than not. I struggle with expressing myself, because it does sometimes feel easier or safer not to.” – Jeff Jarvis

 

42. “We’re fickle, stupid beings with poor memories and a great gift for self-destruction.” – Plutarch

 

43. “The price of dishonesty is self-destruction.” – Rita Mae Brown

 

45. “There’s nothing cool about being self-destructive.” – Patti Smith

quotes on self sabotage

 

46. “Self-destruction is the effect of cowardice in the highest extreme.” – Daniel Defoe

 

47. “Self-sabotage is the smartest thing you can do if you’re sabotaging a self that is not really you.” – Armand DiMele

 

48. “Just remember enough never to be vulnerable again: total forgetting could be as self-destructive as complete remembering.” – Helen Clark MacInnes

 

49. “My default is self-destruction, and anything on top of that is a bloody lot of work.” – Gillian Anderson

 

50. “The most destructive element in the human mind is fear. Fear creates aggressiveness; aggressiveness engenders hostility; hostility engenders fear, a disastrous circle.” – Dorothy Thompson

 

51. “Worry is just about the worst form of mental activity there is-next to hate, which is deeply self destructive. Worry is pointless. It is wasted mental energy. It also created bio-chemical reactions which harm the body, producing everything from indigestion to coronary arrest, and a multitude of things in between.” – Neale Donald Walsch

 

52. “When you don’t work together, you can’t emerge as a force. It becomes what some call a “lonely struggle” and individual self-destruction.” – Haile Gerima

 

53. “One thing so self-destructive is being unaware that you’re not okay.” – Rekeshallys

 

54. “Destruction is the work of an afternoon. Creation is the work of a lifetime.” – Kamahl

quotes on self sabotage

 

55. “I can be very self-destructive, but quietly.” – Sam Taylor-Wood

 

56. “If you are self-important, you are self-destructive.” – Yamini

 

57. “Destruction is easy for humans but creation is too difficult.” – Daniel J. Boorstin

 

58. “If you’re not careful, you can fall into a destructive cycle of self-pity.” – Victoria Osteen

 

59. “Thus another friendship was dashed on the cruel rocks amid the storm of my self-destruction.” – Russell Brand

 

60. “Pride is the parent of destruction; pride eats the mind and the heart and the soul alive.” – Anne Rice

 

61. “It’s been said to me that I’m self-destructive because I’ll walk away from things that are good.” – Ariel Rechtshaid

 

62. “When attempted self-destruction does not cure a man of life, it cures him of voluntary death.” – Honore de Balzac

 

63. “Without love, the acquisition of knowledge only increases confusion and leads to self-destruction.” – Jiddu Krishnamurti

 

64. “The rust of the mind is the destruction of genius.” – Seneca The Younger

quotes on self sabotage

 

65. “And when I get bored, it’s like the worst parts of me come out I really veer to self-destructive tendencies quickly.” – Zoe Kazan

 

66. “When the beginnings of self destruction enter the heart, it seems no bigger than a grain of sand.” – John Cheever

 

67. “Being self-critical is good; being self-hating is destructive. There’s a very find line there somewhere,  and I walk it carefully.” – Daniel Radcliffe

 

68. “Even if we are spared destruction by war, our lives will have to change if we want to save life from self-destruction.” – Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

 

69. “Sometimes seeming happy can be self-destructive even when you’re sane.” – Brandi Carlile

 

70. “I’ve always turned my anger inwards towards self-destruction.” – Mackenzie Phillips

quotes on self sabotage

 

71. “Doubt, not self-reflection, comes from a destructive energy, and when it rears its head, I talk to it like a lunatic.” – Gwyneth Paltrow

 

72. “Revenge can only be found on the road to self-destruction.” – Wayne Gerard Trotman

 

73. “When you’re at peace with yourself and love yourself, it is virtually impossible to do things to yourself that are destructive.” – Wayne Dyer

 

 

And, so, there you have it!

 

73 Quotes on Self Sabotage

 

If you found this post beneficial, or think it could be beneficial to your friends or family, make sure you share it to your social media or through texts and emails! 

 

I always love hearing from you, so don’t be afraid to drop a comment below, email me, or reach out to me on Instagram! 

 

(Oh! Also, don’t forget to check out our new Facebook page. That’s also a great way to stay up to date with our posts!)

 

We are so excited to have you working on your self-growth as we start tackling our self-sabotaging behavior to strive for our best selves!

As always, if you need a sign to take care of yourself: this is it.

See the self-sabotaging behaviors.

Change your mindset.

Just stop sabotaging and start growing.

Because as we all know:

you are the most vital character in your story!

*This post contains affiliate links. I do receive a small commission if you purchase a product using my link, with no addition cost to you! I promise that Becoming the Best Self will never promote anything that has not been used, fully looked into, or that we do not fully support!*

 

FAQ:

  • Where can I find more information on self-sabotage?

We actually have our whole series up now! Self-sabotage can be a heavy, and taboo, topic. So, we try to cover the ins and outs as best as we can.

 

  • Do you have any self care recommendations that could help?

Head on over to this post on easy self care day ideas. We also have a podcast on self care ideas that you could check out!

 

  • Will the next post be relevant to this topic?

We have one more post for this series. So, yes! Our final topic will be discussing how we can help others end their self sabotage.

Make sure you also become our email friend. That will help you stay up to date with all of our tips and tricks to help you become your best self.

 

  • Is there a way I can work with you?

Absolutely! Shoot me an email and we’ll discuss it! I’m open to interviews on both my podcast and blog.

If you’re wanting to hire me as a freelance write or ghostwriter, you can click here or checkout the ‘work with me’ tab on our blog!

 

 

 

 

Peace out, girl scouts!

the best self

… and always aim to be the best self you can be

How to Stop Self-Sabotaging your Life (in 3 easy steps)

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How to Stop Self-Sabotaging your Life

If you are trying to really figure out how to stop self sabotaging your life, you’re in the right spot.

___________________________________________________________

Heres your sign

If you are looking for a sign to get out of bed, take a shower, walk outside, or a simple reminder that you are important: Here it is! This is your sign!

the best self

___________________________________________________________

how to stop self-sabotaging

How to Stop Self-Sabotaging

PODCAST EPISODE AVAILABLE

*This post contains affiliate links. I do receive a small commission if you purchase a product using my link, with no addition cost to you! I promise that Becoming the Best Self will never promote anything that has not been used, fully looked into, or that we do not fully support!*

 

Hey, guys! I seriously recommend reading this post AND listening to our podcast corresponding to it! We bring a little bit of a different approach to each!

 

If you didn’t know, Becoming the Best Self is continuing our series on self sabotage. We have discussed what it is, why we do it, and how to recognize it. Today, we’re going to finally talk about how to stop self sabotaging!

If you think you may be self-sabotaging your life, work, goals, or relationship(s), I promise you- you’re in the right place.

the best self be better

 (Oh, and! Make sure you become our email friend by clicking here. This way, you can stay up to date throughout this series. We’ll let you know each time a new post is up and give you even more tips than these posts provide. Also, you’ll get first dibs on our freebies and products!)

 

how to stop self-sabotaging

How to Stop Self-Sabotaging in 3 quick steps

 

Okay, I may be exaggerating with the “quick” part. But, let’s be real- no real growth comes quickly!

 

Although it may take some work, I’m going to give you 3 (pretty easy) steps that will teach you how to stop self-sabotaging your happiness, growth, and success. Let’s get started.

 

Step 1. Recognize your self-sabotaging behavior(s).

 

If you’ve kept up with our blog or podcast for any amount of time, I know you have this concept drilled into your head. But, I’ll say it again: we have to recognize who we are and what we’re doing to be able to change our life.

 

How can you expect to grow, succeed, and flourish if you aren’t willing to step back and see what’s currently stopping you from living your dreams?

 

So, if you think you hindering your own abilities, you have to first recognize what you’re doing wrong. That’s when you’ll be able to begin to stop self-sabotaging.

 

Since we have an entire post in relation to how exactly you can recognize self-sabotaging behavior, I’m not going to elaborate on it now. 

 

But, we are going to look at a couple ways to go about recognizing these signs:

 

 

  • Journal

If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it 1,000 times: start a freaking journal.

Listen, I emphasize this so much because it’s so valuable! Journal about anything and everything.

If absolutely nothing else comes from it, you’ll be amazed at the amount of growth you can look back on.

Grab a journal like this and just start writing!

 

  • Talk about it

Sometimes it’s hard to actually see what exactly you’re doing wrong.

This is why it’s so important to have a small (or big, if you’re blessed) network of good and honest people by your side. And, I’m not just talking about your casual “bestfriends”.

I’m referring to the best of the best people in your life. The one(s) that you can call on whenever and they can calm you down, help you, and motivate you. You know, the real ones.

Now, I only have a few of these people in my life. But, I know they’re going to tell me how it is. They aren’t afraid of telling me when or if I’m doing/being wrong. 

If I’m being crazy, they tell me. If I’m standing in my own way, they tell me. Likewise, if I need to walk away from something, they tell me. If I can’t see sabotage or harm in my life, but they do- they tell me.

 

“Jess, I don’t have a single friend like that.”

 

First of all, email me. Seriously, talk to me. If you need a supportive friend, email me, message me on Facebook, or DM me on Instagram. (But, keep in mind, I am going to be real with you. I am not going to listen to self-sabotaging excuses.)

Secondly, check yourself. 

If you ‘think’ you have a lot of friends, but don’t have anyone like I just described, then you are surrounding yourself with people who are dragging you down with them.

If they aren’t motivating you, they’re holding you back.

So, walk away from who you need to. Here’s your sign to leave the bad energy behind and burn bridges. 

Start networking with like-minded individuals. Work with people who want to grow and succeed. Support people who are where you want to be. Build connections with those who you can grow with.

 

Step 2. Change your mindset and habits.

 

We started discussing mindset changed in our very first post in this series. And look a’here. It’s one of the top three steps on how to stop self-sabotaging.

 

Everything that we do, say, shame, support all stem from one thing: our thoughts. But, our thoughts stem from our mindset.

 

So, if you are self-sabotaging your life by your actions that are coming from your thoughts, change your mindset.

 

The hardest part of working through a mindset shift is that you have to do it alone. And, here’s the reason why- no one is in your head with you. No one else has the ability to track your thoughts. 

 

But, it is  V I T A L  that you begin shifting how you think and what you think about:

 

  • Stop doubting your abilities.
  • Start thinking highly and positively about yourself.
  • Stop worrying about what others are going to think.
  • Start working on what makes you happy.
  • Stop living your life for other people.
  • Start making life what you want it to be!

 

Step 3. Stop (and start).

how to stop self sabotaging

 

Stop self-sabotaging and start working for your success. At the end of the day, you just have to stop. If you honestly want to know how to stop self-sabotaging your life, the answer itself really is that simple.

 

Just stop.

 

Once you recognize your self-sabotaging behavior(s) and shift your mindset to set yourself up for success, then just stop anything and everything that isn’t benefitting you.

 

Then, start working.

 

At the same time you are stopping self-sabotage, you need to begin working towards success and strive for growth.

 

I can’t tell you what’s stopping you. But, you have to figure it out and fix it. And, once you do, work to make sure you never let it get in your way again.

 

Success doesn’t come easy. Growth isn’t quick. Happiness won’t be effortless.

 

If you know what’s stopping you, why continue doing it?

If you know what needs to be done, why not do it?

 

If you found this post beneficial, or think it could be beneficial to your friends or family, make sure you share it to your social media or through texts and emails! 

 

I always love hearing from you, so don’t be afraid to drop a comment below, email me, or reach out to me on Instagram! 

 

(Oh! Also, don’t forget to check out our new Facebook page. That’s also a great way to stay up to date with our posts!)

 

We are so excited to have you working on your self-growth as we start tackling our self-sabotaging behavior to strive for our best selves!

As always, if you need a sign to take care of yourself: this is it.

See the self-sabotaging behaviors.

Change your mindset.

Just stop sabotaging and start growing.

Because as we all know:

you are the most vital character in your story!

*This post contains affiliate links. I do receive a small commission if you purchase a product using my link, with no addition cost to you! I promise that Becoming the Best Self will never promote anything that has not been used, fully looked into, or that we do not fully support!*

 

Related articles:
What is self-sabotage
Why do we self-sabotage
Self-sabotaging signs to look for
Examples of self-sabotaging behavior

 

 

Peace out, girl scouts!

the best self

… and always aim to be the best self you can be.

35 Examples of How You’re Self Sabotaging Your Happiness

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35 Self Sabotaging Examples

Being able to recognize the ways you are self sabotaging your growth and happiness is the first step in stopping these behaviors. We’re going to look at 35 examples of how we self sabotage.

___________________________________________________________

Heres your sign

If you are looking for a sign to get out of bed, take a shower, walk outside, or a simple reminder that you are important: Here it is! This is your sign!

the best self

___________________________________________________________

 

self sabotaging

Self Sabotaging Examples [Part 4]

PODCAST AVAILABLE

To stop our self sabotaging behavior, we have to know what needs to change.

Throughout this post, we’ll go through specific ways you may be self-sabotaging. If you find yourself saying, “Ooof. I definitely do that,” don’t worry!

At the end of this post we’ll focus on the top way to eliminate our self-sabotaging habits.

 

the best self be better

 

Before we get started, I want to let you know that this post is a part of our July series on self-sabotage.

Throughout the remainder of this month, we’re going to look at all things self-sabotage: what it is, how to stop, how it affects us and why we do it!

If you think you may be self-sabotaging your life, work, goals, or relationship(s), I promise you- you’re in the right place! 

 (Make sure you become our email friend by clicking here. This way, you can stay up to date throughout this series. We’ll let you know each time a new post is up and give you even more tips than these posts provide. Also, you’ll get first dibs on our freebies and products!)

 

self sabotaging examples

35 Examples of Self Sabotaging Your Happiness

Work Behaviors

  • You tell your employer or coworkers that you can do more than you actually can.
  • You show up consistently late and unprepared.
  • Even when you need the break, you never deny new projects because you fear the reaction from your employer.

 

Relationships

  • You blame other people for the situation(s) you are in.
  • Instead of practicing healthy communication, you choose to give the silent treatment.
  • You choose not to be vulnerable for fear of someone taking advantage of you.
  • You pay more attention to what your partner could fix, than what you could fix.
  • Instead of listening to what your partner is trying to tell you, you turn on your self-defense.
  • You justify your actions rather than trying to understand why your partner feels the way they do about your actions.

 

Self-confidence

  • You constantly compare yourself to others.
  • You are uncomfortable in situations where all, or even some, of the spotlight is on you.
  • You feel like you are unworthy of happiness, success, love, etc.
  • You don’t prioritizing learning who you are, what you offer, and how you work.
  • When you see your peers gain success, you get jealous rather than proud.
  • You question your purpose.

 

Energy Output

  • You feel drained more often than you feel your best.
  • Even when you know you should say no, you say yes and take on more than you can actually handle.
  • Instead of choosing to focus on what’s going right, you focus on what’s going wrong.
  • You do not have a monthly, weekly, or daily routine to stick with.

 

Health

  • You don’t stay hydrated throughout the day.
  • You easily talk yourself out of working out, even when you know you need to.
  • You eat fast food for convenience, rather than prioritizing the time to fix healthier meals.
  • You don’t prioritize working on your mental health and working through your trauma.
  • Instead of finding something productive to work on, you binge eat when you are bored.

 

Self-care

  • You push yourself without ever taking a break.
  • You spend multiple hours on social media throughout your day.
  • Watching a season of your favorite show on Netflix takes precedence over journaling, meditation, etc.
  • You procrastinate the big tasks you need to get done rather than at least starting them.
  • You spend more time drinking than you do sleeping.
  • When you come to roadblock in your life, you swerve around it rather than try to fix it.
  • You don’t like learning new things because it takes too much work.

 

Money Habits

  • You impulse buy without considering if you have the funds to comfortably do so.
  • You choose to overlook your budget often.
  • You prioritize getting a morning coffee every day, even if you know you should be saving your money.
  • Instead of saving money for luxury items, you put it on a credit card.

self sabotaging examples

Overcoming Self-Sabotaging Behavior

First of all, I’m sure you didn’t relate to every single self sabotaging example I listed.

(Although, you might have, and that’s okay!)

Maybe, you just related to a few of these examples. (Even if the exact situation is slightly different.)

Regardless, self-sabotage is real and it can absolutely ruin your happiness.

Since we know these examples of self sabotaging behavior starts in our mind, we have to work on changing our mindset.

 

Shifting Your Mindset

self sabotage is real I do understand that mindset changes don’t come easy.

But, our mindset determines how we live, what we get out of life, what we strive for, and how we help others.

Meaning, it’s pretty daggum important.

The first step in changing your mindset is to practice self-awareness.

You have to seriously focus on who you are, to understand what needs to change.

Then, to seriously stop self sabotaging your happiness, pay attention to your thoughts before they become actions.

If you find yourself thinking negatively about anything in your life (work, self-confidence, money, relationships), just stop.

Immediately change your mindset into a more positive and encouraging thought! That way, your following actions will push you towards happiness and growth. (Because I’m sure you know by now, self sabotaging behavior eliminates the possibility of living a thriving life.)

 

 

On the next post, we’ll go into more detail on how to stop self sabotaging our lives:

Can I Stop Self Sabotaging my Life?

 

Start eliminating these self sabotaging examples from your life!

If you found this post beneficial, or think it could be beneficial to your friends or family, make sure you share it to your social media or through texts and emails!

I always love hearing from you, so don’t be afraid to drop a comment below, email me, or reach out to me on Instagram! (Oh! Also, don’t forget to check out our new Facebook page. That’s also a great way to stay up to date with our posts!)

We are so excited to have you working on your self-growth as we start tackling our self-sabotaging behavior to strive for our best selves!

 

As always, if you need a sign to take care of yourself: this is it.

Change your mindset.

Recognize these behaviors.

Practice self-awareness.

Because as we all know:

you are the most vital character in your story!

 

Related Articles:
What is Self Sabotage
15 Reasons Why We self sabotage
Do You Self sabotage?

 

Peace out, girl scouts!

the best self

… and always aim to be the best self you can be.

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