What is Trauma Therapy?

Trauma therapy is how we are going to focus on healing and growing from our trauma.

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If you are looking for a sign to get out of bed, take a shower, walk outside, or a simple reminder that you are important: Here it is! This is your sign!

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What is Trauma Therapy:

Breaking the Stigma

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DISCLAIMER: I AM NOT A DOCTOR, COUNSELOR, OR THERAPIST. THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION IS MERELY BASED OFF OF SCHOLARLY RESEARCH (LINKED), AS WELL AS PERSONAL EXPERIENCE, THAT I HAVE FOUND TO BE INFORMATIVE IN REGARDS TO TRAUMA. I HIGHLY ENCOURAGE YOU TO DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH ON THIS TOPIC. I RECOMMEND A CONSULTATION WITH YOUR DOCTOR IF YOU ARE SUFFERING THROUGH TRAUMA.

 

This series may also bring up traumatic experiences and/or responses. Although I am going to try to avoid using examples, I cannot assure you this will not be a trigger for some. It is your choice to continue reading.

 

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We’ve made it to Part 3 of this trauma series!

 

It’s time to begin recognizing trauma and bringing awareness to it. This may sound scary, but I want you to stay with me. It’s time to work on us. Believe me: you owe this to yourself.

 

**Even if you aren’t personally experiencing trauma, or trauma related problems, I urge you to still read over this series! As we all know, knowledge is power, and you never know when you may learn some valuable information that you can help someone else with!**

 

 

Let me start off by saying that if you have been following this series, I’m so proud of you! If you haven’t, let me update you real quickly!

 

Part one of this series goes over what exactly trauma is! We define it, and then break that definition down! We also begin to look at different types of trauma. It’s almost like an “intro” page, where we learn the background on the topic we are covering. You can click here to read part one!

 

Part two of this series starts talking about the causes of trauma. It’s important for us to know where trauma can stem from, in order to begin working through it on our own. We list out some potential causes (with descriptions) of trauma, but then we get into trauma psychology and how to begin by yourself! If you click here, you can read all of part two!

 

Now, that we’re all up to speed, welcome to part three of becoming the best self’s mini-series on trauma! After learning about what trauma is and finding the causes of trauma, our next step in trauma therapy is to begin recognizing trauma! Once we recognize our own trauma, if any, we can then begin helping others and lead to the break of the trauma stigma!

 

I’m going to be sectioning this post on working through what trauma therapy is into two parts:

 

• First, we are going to discuss recognizing trauma, as it pertains to our own life. Meaning, we are focusing on ourselves. For some, this may result in no new information, but this could bring up many new realizations for others.

We will also look at signs we can watch for to bring awareness to our trauma, or to halt any reactions we may have. Don’t let me lose you though: if you aren’t dealing with trauma in your life, the second half is for you!

 

• In the second half, we are going to start to break the stigma around trauma. We’ll be looking at ways to notice trauma signs and symptoms within other people.

Now, this doesn’t mean we will be allowed to go around calling out people’s flaws. This information isn’t to judge others. We are finding ways to help people!

This second half will be focusing on ways we can be there for others who may be struggling, lend out a hand, and help get them the help and resources they may need!

 

Whew. You ready?

 

Let’s get started.

 

 

1. Recognizing Trauma as an Introduction to Trauma Therapy

 

Let me start this with: research indicates that survivors who choose not to process their trauma are just a psychologically healthy as those who do. So, if you decide to run past this part and head straight into the second half of this post, helping others who are struggling, that is okay! It will not mean you are weak, and it won’t mean that you can’t grow.

 

(Although I believe ultimate self growth, and becoming our best self, starts with working inward, sometimes our biggest growth can come from helping others!)

 

With that being said, I really do value the importance of working on ourselves. That’s why I wanted to do this trauma series! I want to be able to work on ourselves together and have this support system! I hope to encourage you in ways that will help you thrive and seriously become the best self you can be!

 

*REmember, I am not a therapist. I have put in valuable time researching these topics over and over, but I not a certified therapist. In the following paragraphs, i will be going over how i, personally, am (or would be) taking steps to work on trauma, as well as help others. I think it is important for you to also do your own research and/or reach out to a therapist or professional.*

 

Trauma therapy is how we are going to work through recognizing our trauma, dealing with our trauma, and growing through our trauma. We’ve talked about the causes of trauma. Now, let’s get into the symptoms of trauma.

 

Like I’ve said many times before, trauma is vague. Since trauma can be caused by so many different things, the reactions people have to their circumstances, and the signs they show, can vary greatly. Being in tune with our emotions is very important, but knowing that other people will react differently- and that it is okay to do so- is of upmost importance.

 

Before we begin with symptoms, I want to point out that trauma can alter three cognitive patters. These patterns include your thoughts on how you perceive yourself, how you perceive the world or society, and how you perceive your future.

 

Alright, so now let’s list some common (or maybe not so common) signs you can look for in your daily life to recognize trauma:

 

• Lost hope

  • Often times, trauma leads to losing hope of your purpose and losing hope in the world in general. Due to your trauma, there may be parts of your life that you think will never recover. Maybe you have a terrible experience with the opposite sex, which keeps you feeling like every person of that gender is bad.

That’s a broad example, but I do not want to get too detailed on the source of your trauma. Loss of hope is a feeling. It’s the result of a let-down expectation, even if you never knew an expectation was there in the first place.

 

• • • To begin working on reversing the idea of losing hope, start thinking about ways you have personally lost hope or what you have lost hope in. When you find these examples, trace them back to their source. That’s where we have to start working. Listen, I am here to reassure you that life will be okay. You will be okay.

 

• Headaches

  • It’s overlooked, but trauma can cause physical damage, just as much as it can cause emotional and mental damage. Our mental health can cause legit, serious illnesses. It’s safe to assume our trauma can too. This is why I find it such an important, yet taboo, topic! It NEEDS to be discussed. We need to be working on ourselves so that we can take care of ourselves.

 

• • • There are many ways to combat the physical toll trauma, or any mental health block, can cause. But, my personal favorite way is to move and hydrate. This doesn’t mean drink a gallon and lift heavy weights, but it does mean to maybe walk around your room and drink a glass of water. Start small, and work towards your health. It’s easier to maintain, or increase, these habits if we start by gradually applying them into our daily routines!

 

• Feeling overwhelmed with, or numbed, by your emotions

  • Ah, our emotions. How great they can be. “Jess, emotions suck.” Hahaaa, okay I know. I have a whole post on being hurt, which you can find here, but in regards to trauma therapy, I want to focus on the emotional signs of feeling like your emotions are drowning you, or if you feel like you are becoming numb. Neither are good right? Even though they are polar opposites, they are seemingly one in the same.

 

• • • This is a hard one to solve because it takes time, with constant work. Some simple suggestions that I would give to gain back your sense of worth and controlling your emotions if you are feeling overwhelmed would be to start by targeting how you feel. About anything and everything. Once you have your list, go through and decide what is valid and what is of no importance. When you have your ‘no-need-for’ examples, start practicing to remind yourself that you do not need to stress about these subjects. It sounds easy, I know it’s not. But, we have to try.

 

• • • If you are feeling numb, begin looking at things you feel as though you SHOULD be having emotions over. (Losing someone, failing classes, struggling with sleeping, etc.) Point out what you know you need to start focusing on, and then do just that: focus on them. Make yourself feel things about them, so that you can begin fixing them.

 

• Cognitive errors and intrusive thoughts

  • Cognitive errors are when you misread a situation that you are in, due to your mind relating that situation to your trauma. From my understanding, this is mostly resulted in a panicked overreaction. Intrusive thoughts are thoughts that take you back to the memory that caused the trauma.

 

• • • A big way psychologists and therapists work with clients who have been through traumatic experiences is by the teaching them grounding techniques. Although there is a variety of ways to perform this, grounding techniques are used, personally, to literally ground yourself. Find your footing, per-say. You use your sensory nerves to bring awareness back to yourself: your life, your control, you ability, your comfort, etc. Don’t make this harder than it has to be! Work with what’s near you!

 

• • • • Smell something and describe the scent to yourself
      • Put your hands under running water
      • Pick up items near you and focus on their color, texture, weight
      • Drink or eat something and vividly tell yourself what you are tasting
      • Feel your body move: wiggle your fingers or toes, stretch, breathe deeply
      • 5-4-3-2-1 method: List 5 things you can see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can touch, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste

 

• Self-harm

  • Self- harm can be due to so many different factors, and is a very deep concept, but I wouldn’t feel right leaving this out when discussing the signs of trauma. This is such a big deal, and I don’t know why people don’t take it more seriously than they do. It’s one of those things that doesn’t really hit until its happening to someone close to you. I digress.

Self- harm is anything that inflicts pain on yourself. Now, I don’t have specific ‘tips’ for this, but I have a recommendation: talk to someone. There are many anonymous groups, find one close to you and go. Take a friend you trust, if you aren’t yet comfortable going on your own. Find a therapist. Reach out to a hotline.

 

• • • Hotline numbers (because I never want you to feel like you don’t know where to turn):
      • Text HOME to 741741
      • Call:
        • 1-800-273-8255 (The National Suicide Prevention Line)
        • 1-800-334-4357 (Self-Harm Prevention)
        • 1-800-366-8288 (Self-Harm Helpline)

 

There are more signs you can look for in yourself, and your daily habits, when trying to recognize symptoms of trauma within yourself, but honestly that would be a forever long blog post. I still want to encourage you to do your own research as well!

 

But, for now, stay with me here and read the next part about how you can help others look for, and deal with, signs of trauma. The ways listed can also be looked for in yourself, by yourself! So, let’s break the stigma trauma has and start helping others, and ourselves, heal!

 

2. Breaking the Stigma of Trauma Therapy by Helping

 

To break the stigma of something, we first need to normalize it.

 

Now, I don’t think trauma is not something that needs to be normalized, because the cause is normally something that could have been prevented and should have never been done in the first place.

 

With that being said, we need to normalize the idea that people do suffer with trauma. We also need to normalize helping people. We need to normalize trauma therapy.

 

“What do you mean normalize?”

 

Thanks for asking! Normalizing things ourselves is actually pretty easy, but getting society as a whole to normalize things is a whole different concept. To normalize something, we really just have to fully understand that these things happen.

 

We need to understand that we all live a variety of different lives, have entirely different situations daily, and possibly go through drastic changes regularly.

 

Life happens. And it really does happen differently to everyone. You don’t get to say if someone’s trauma is justifiable or not. It’s not your choice how, or even if, they choose to work on themselves.

 

Your only job, as a decent human being, is to support people, be there for them, and help when and where you can. That’s what this section it about:

 

How to be there for someone dealing with trauma

+ 10 ways to help with their trauma therapy

 

**Y’all know I have to do my disclaimers. I am not a doctor. I am not a therapist. I am not a psychologist. I have studied this information, and am comfortable sharing this personal advice with you. But, I am not saying these are ultimate fixes. If you think someone is struggling, reach out on your own terms.**

 

In a few seconds, I’m going to be listing of signs to look for in your friends and/or family if you think they are struggling with trauma and then give you a few ways to help guide them in the right directions to help them begin healing through trauma therapy!

 

But first, I just want to remind you that these subjects, signs, or symptoms can be very private, personal, or deep for individuals. If you are wanting to help someone, you need to approach the topic appropriately.

 

If you do not strongly believe that you are close enough to have this discussion with this said person, find someone who is. Do not attack someone. You would not want to be attacked, do not do that to someone else.

 

I also want to remind you, once again, that you should do your own research! Yes, I use credible sources and try to link the sites I use, but I am not a professional. Also, education is powerful! You need to learn how you, and society work! That way, you can begin to understand why you do, or feel, the things you do, and so you can try to accept why other people are how they are!

 

Alright, let’s talk about some signs:

 

• The Physical Signs

• • Trauma can cause dissociation. If you start noticing these in your friend, you may not need to immediately discuss trauma with them, but it wouldn’t hurt to let them know you are a listening ear for them!

 

• • • Glazed/ daydreaming eyes (often or constantly)
    • Long (unusual) periods of silence
    • Sudden conversation drop/ tune out
    • Seems “numb”
    • Self-harm
    • Unusual sleeping pattern/ lack of sleep
    • Dizziness
    • Changes with appetite (too much or too little)
    • Low hydration (take them a glass of water)
    • Low activity (walk around a store)

 

• The Emotional Signs

  • Emotional signs may be harder to notice. Some people are good at covering up and pretending. Also, these signs could mean many different things, so do not accuse someone of dealing with trauma. Just be there for them!

 

• • • The “damaged-goods” mindset
    • Constantly being on edge, not feeling safe or content
    • Overwhelmed feeling
    • High level of stress
    • Sadness
    • Anger
    • Denial
    • Shame

 

• The Social Signs

  • I am going to give examples of social signs being both in a relationship and in group settings. As with the emotional signs, there’s are not ‘one-size-fits-all’ examples and should not be treated as such.

 

• • • Unwilling to be in social settings (if this is abnormal behavior)
    • Increased anxiety
    • Low self-esteem
    • Unstable relationship patterns
    • Disengagement in interpersonal settings

 

 

Now that we know the signs, let’s put together 10 steps in becoming a good support system in trauma therapy!

 

1-5 are ways to vulnerably be there for people

 

6-10 are steps you can actively take to help

 

1. Educate yourself.

   • I can not stress this enough. Educate yourself on trauma, trauma psychology, trauma therapy… Learn about everything you can! If you care about this person, invest some of your time into learning about these topics. You can’t help someone if you don’t know how to.
   • Also, you can never have too much knowledge. That just simply isn’t a thing. If there’s something you want to know, or wonder about, educate yourself!! We have too many available resources to be ignorant.

 

2. Talk.

• • Don’t accuse. Just talk. Get to know people. Let me tell you, humans can be fascinating creatures. Also, so many things can come out of a simple conversation. Just talk to them!

 

3. Listen.

• • You hear it all the time, but be a shoulder to cry on. Let people get close to you and open up to you. Don’t expose them or ever use that information against them. But, listen. Some people have a lot to say, and having the right person hear them could make a world of difference.
  • More times than not, people will tell you exactly what they need. You only have to ask and be willing to fully listen.

 

4. Support them.

• • People need support. Whether you realize it or not, and no matter how many times you’ve tried to convince yourself that you don’t, we need support. We thrive on validation. We want people to accept us and stand behind us! So, be supportive. Especially when someone may be struggling more than you. We need each other.

 

5. Remind them of their value.

1. • Trauma can leave individuals feelings absolutely wrecked. Do you know how much of an impact you can make by just telling someone that this world, and you, need them? Honestly, we underestimate the power of our words.

 

6. Send a meaningful text.

1. • Reflecting back to 1-5, here’s your chance to really reach out. Do your part.

 

7. Increase personal time with them.

1. • Once again, look at 1-5. All of these steps need you to give a set amount of undivided attention to this person. Personal time means no phone, no television, no internet, and no distractions. Focus on being in the moment. I know this isn’t a reasonable suggestion to many, but if you have the opportunity to do this- do it.

 

8. Integrate some grounding techniques we looked at in the beginning of this post!

1. • This doesn’t mean to tell people what to do, but if you notice they need to ground themselves, slowly and nonchalantly get them to use a grounding technique or two!

 

9. Discuss the options and resources they have.

1. • Only do this if you are close enough with the individual, and they have expressed the want for this! But, collaborate with them and talk about what they could do! Talk about what they are comfortable doing: joining group therapy, getting a personal therapist, adding a self-care tactic to their routine, etc.

 

10. Help them get more help!

• • Although you are going to be a great support system for them, sometimes extra help is needed! If they are wanting to find a group or therapist to work with, help them find opportunities! If they want access to hotlines, give them the ones above! If someone is feeling overwhelmed, or underwhelmed for that matter, even the thought of finding help can be exhausting. Help them by giving them more resources!

 

So, guys. There you have it.

 

10 ways to help someone that may be going through trauma therapy.

 

I’m going to wrap this up here!

 

I know this was a long one. So, if you made it this far, thank you!

 

If you are reading these to help yourself- you are doing amazing. I am proud of you!

 

If you are reading these to help someone else- I hope you are able to implement some of these recommendations into the relationship! Thank you for being a good support system.

 

If you are reading these just to learn more about trauma, I applaud you! You are killing the self-growth game by adding more knowledge to your life!

 

As always, do not hesitate to reach out! I am here for you. I care about you. I value you.

 

You can drop a comment, email me (icon) or DM me on Instagram (icon)!

 

I would love to hear from you!

 

As always, if you need a sign to take care of yourself: this is it.

Break the stigma.

Check in on someone else.

Check in on yourself.

Because as we all know:

you are the most vital character in your story!

 

Related articles:

CLick here for part 1- Trauma: what exactly is it

Click here for part 2- What Causes Trauma? + 3 Steps to Begin Trauma Psychology

 

The trauma llama will be back, soon.

Peace out, girl scouts!

… and always aim to be the best self you can be.